Prenuptial Agreements: 5 Mistakes to Avoid

So the prenuptial agreement might be one of the more unromantic aspects of getting married. However, it is important to remember at the end of the day, getting married is a business agreement also. Therefore, if having a prenuptial agreement makes sense for your relationship, here are a few mistakes to avoid to help the process go as smoothly as possible.

You Don’t Talk About It

First, not talking about sticky subjects in your relationship (whatever they may be) is never a good practice. It is always best to address these issues head on and flesh them out until you both feel better. It has always been my experience that these topics are way less difficult than you imagine them to be after you talk about them with your partner. Also, I also often find I feel closer and more in love with Jon after we have talked through the issue or topic that was bothering me. It usually ends in a win-win for everyone. ☺

Therefore, bring up the prenuptial agreement topic early in the wedding planning. Have a goal to have the document signed at least 6 months before the wedding.

You Have the Same Lawyer

I know this might feel divisive, but it is very important you both hire separate counsel to review your prenuptial agreement. It is very difficult for an attorney to advise you both on the prenuptial agreement from your two different perspectives. You will have a much stronger agreement, if you hire two separate attorneys to advise and review the final document before you sign.

You Let Your Emotions Get in the Way of Negotiating

This is a tough one. It’s probably almost impossible to keep your emotions completely out of formulating this business agreement. My advice is to lean on your attorney for this topic and remember to be open to hearing any advice or negotiating strategy he or she might suggest. This is hopefully a document that you will never have to enforce. However, if you do, you will be thankful for your attorney’s counsel now.

You Rush to “Get Through It”

Even though this is not a fun task, it is really important you do your due diligence and take your time through the process of formulating this document. Following your lawyer’s lead and go through the process step by step. It will be over before you know it. Your future self will thank you!

You Think About the Prenup After it is Signed

The best thing you can do after this process is over, is put the agreement in a drawer – and forget about it! This is hopefully a document you will never need to refer to again. And rehashing everything you just went through over and over again in your head, is counterproductive and a waste of your time. Get back to focusing on the important aspects of your relationship – good communication, think of new ways to love and support each other and find new adventures and experiences you can create together.

Take aways…

Remember having a prenuptial agreement does not mean your wedding is doomed from the beginning. It means both you and your partner are savvy and understand this agreement may be best for your financial well being in future – even in the event you never consider divorce. Commend yourselves for being forwarding thinkers – and get back to focusing on the exciting happy chapter in your lives you are about to begin together!